Ditching Parents on the Way to School

I have two kids, one in Jr Hi and one in Elementary… and this year something interesting has happened. We live close to their schools and when the weather permits, we like to walk. And for various reasons, they have both ditched me on the way to school.

Now, I expect this from the Jr Hi kid, because he is at that age where everything I do embarrasses him. And to be fair, I do my best to embarrass him – it is so much fun… so, about a half block from the school, when we start to see other students, he slowly disengages and walks faster than me, heading at an angle to cross the street and enter school ‘alone’ while I veer the other direction and head home. We’ve been doing this for quite a while so I am used to it. But last week, my younger son asked me to hang back so his buddies wouldn’t see me and I will admit, this stung a little.

Now, I know that in the larger picture this doesn’t mean much. It doesn’t mean that my kids don’t love me. It doesn’t mean that they want to move out at the first opportunity… but I was surprised at my own reaction. It bugged me. It saddened me. It hurt.

I don’t recall ever doing this to my folks when I was a kid, mainly because we rode the bus. But as a ’spiritual kid’ I have often ditched my Father outside of school. Sometimes as literally as putting God aside before entering a room of people… sometimes ditching Him outside of a conversation… sometimes turning my eyes away when I had a decision to make… a person I should love… a stand I should take… sometimes I ditch Jesus in the areas of where I spend my money, how I spend my time… and based on my own experiences, I bet it bugs Him, I bet it hurts.

Beyond the obvious lesson of not ditching Christ in the everyday moments of life, I learned something deep about the character of God on that morning outside of the Elementary school… my gut reaction was to be mad all day, maybe a little snippy when my kids got home – let them know that they had hurt my feelings. But when has God ever treated me like that? When has He ever been snippy with me? Every time that I can recall ditching Him, He has loved me anyway. Even hurt by my decisions, my choices, He has loved me anyway. So on that day when both my kids ditched me on the way to school, I got to aim higher and love them anyway.

And isn’t that the Gospel in a nutshell? Jesus loves us anyway.

An African Blog, a Celtic Journal, and the Seeds of a new CD

A few months back, my wife sent me an email with a link to a blog. The blog was being written by a friend of ours who was spending some time in Africa. In a post entitled ‘The Cry Of My Heart’ she ends with this line:

“Without Christ I am nothing. Apart from Him there is nothing good that I can do. And yet in His great love and mercy He has chosen to use the foolish things of this world… He has called those that He has rescued to love the world as He loves it. These are the thoughts that I have been pondering the last few days… this is the cry of my heart—that I would draw so close to my Jesus that my heartbeat falls in rhythm with His and that through my life His love would be displayed vibrantly as a testimony to His greatness”

My management team has on occasion suggested to me the possibility of recording 1) a ‘praise and worship’ record (which I am not interested in) and 2) an edgier youth oriented record (which I am interested in). After hearing so much P&W music that is simplistic, overly repetitive, chronically ‘me’ centered and musically dumbed down – I wonder if an ‘artistic’ worship album is possible? Or is all music written unto the Creator, in actuality, worship music? Won’t I bring the most honor to Him by crafting the best music I can? By digging deep?

The phrase from our friend’s blog – the cry of my heart – struck a chord with both my wife and myself… maybe I can dig into this phrase, this desire, this call and make a record that is both the rockier, youth edged one as well as (through the back door) a worship-ful record?

Knowing that the first phase of any record is the writing, I went to Barnes and Noble and found a small journal with a Celtic design on the front and started jotting down notes, thoughts and ideas. This  journal will hold the chronicle of the journey from seed to CD, with all of the complete songs, incomplete songs, fragments, titles, versions, ruminations, and musings that go into the writing.

And when it is all over… there may be a new CD from the effort. Or as my wife pointed out, maybe a new depth of heart… indeed.